I’ve always loved the mantra “Go big or go home.”

Anyone that has ever seen me play a tennis match or a basketball game can attest I embrace this belief. Good or bad. But I like risks and I like big rewards. Probably a good thing I don’t gamble.

But in the past few months I’ve come to realize - I have been somewhat of a hypocrite. And yes, I know it’s a strong word. With a lot of self awareness and time, I’ve realized I have been hypocritical in ways. 

While trying to build a publishing company and other small start-ups, (and not knowing what I’m doing) I attempt follow that mantra.

But in terms of launching this site - this is where it’s been the biggest struggle. For three years I mulled around this idea. Thinking of ways to have a journalism outlet and also be able to chase my entrepreneurial dreams. But I couldn’t figure out how to do it.

Except I had. I knew I wanted to create a site mixing my four biggest passions (Music, Sports, Entrepreneurship, and Sneakers) in one place. They cross contaminate more and more everyday and plus, I love them. And if it’s my site, I would have the creative freedom.

How can I sit across from my intern, my mentor, one of our writers and ask them to go for it - when I know I haven’t fully been going for it? When I have been compartmentalizing things I go for… and seemingly without knowing making reasons to not go for them.

So why wasn’t I going for it all? What made this site so scary to create and just do it? (What up Nike)

I think it stems from two things: Fear and Perfectionism 

Every time I thought of this site - I would have so many thoughts swirl around in my head:

- “What if my writing wasn’t good enough?

- “What if I made tons of mistakes?” 

- “What if no one even takes the time to read or care about it?”

Doubt - It’s an ugly thing. 

I like to think I don’t care what other people think - but on some level everyone does. And it can be toxic.

Second, when I would get over these thoughts, I would slip into the never ending cycle of perfectionism.

I would overthink every little detail and want to make sure everything was perfect. This became paralyzing.

So there might be typos, there might be misspellings, there might be things I have to go back and clarify. But here it is. And I can almost guarantee “entrepreneur” will be misspelled a few times a year.

But nothing to me has been more intimidating and vulnerable as launching this site.

But you know what - Nothing great comes easy. Incredible opportunities come from situations that make you uncomfortable.

And this is vulnerable. This is risky. This is new. 

And new can be scary. 

So I promise to the readers here to be as transparent and real as possible.

And to continue in this section of entrepreneurship writing about the lessons I am learning/struggling with in the most honest way.

So thanks for checking out this post.

So if you want to take this journey with me - I’d love to have you. Please join the email list to stay up to date on posts, videos, etc!

Kendall